Paris m'a changé.





I'll take you back to Friday, July 11th at around noon. I am sitting in class, carefully listening to the prof talk about how to make canard and I keep thinking in my mind "if I don't go somewhere this weekend, i'll be regretful." My friend Katherine says "hey, my friend lives in Paris, let's go."

ok let's go...

even though I am going back to Paris in a couple weeks for a much longer stay, I decided to get on the next train to a city I had no idea at the time would change my life.

i could go into every single detail of the trip, but, as dramatic as this may sound, it's very difficult for me to even recount my "made memories."


i was lucky enough to stay with a friend of a friend in paris. there i hung out with some cool ass dudes. we jumped around town, talked, drank, laughed, shared stories, fears, past loves, etc. i am very much impressed with every single soul i was able to meet in this marvelous town. but i would love to share with you a moment that i hope to never forget...

it was saturday night and everything in the sweet paris air was still and over. the stores were closed, the children to bed and the hustle and bustle of city transportation to a quite lull... my host and his friends took me to the eiffel tour. we sat on the grass and drank beer. there i was, shivering with chill and excitement as i gazed up at the breathtaking twinkling night lights of the most beautiful silhouette one could imagine. the tour. the tour people only dream of seeing in person. the tour that Gustave was so proud of. the 324 m of French Revolution, pride, art, grandness. the 10,000 tonnes of hard work. the 10,000 tonnes of brilliance.

love was in the air. it’s so true, all the clichés. the globs of young, French lovers whispering dreams and wishes, hope and regrets, lost loves and future ones. the variety of struggling musicians, hoping a willing ear will stop and listen. the games of the youth, chasing, kicking, punching, laughing. the individuality, all saying something different, all saying something new.

there i sat, 21 years old and hardly a worry in the world. sitting underneath this structure with complete peace of mind. thinking about my past, my future. knowing that nothing in this world could possibly be more beautiful than this moment. the sweet roar of conversation creeping into my ear. the sweet melody of intangible joy forcing it’s way in as well.

at this very moment i realized that my future has no grip on me. i am my own future. i could sit in this very spot, just under the breast of the tour and gain the nourishment i need to survive. i could be just fine. i could be just fine.

i refuse to let my future grip me into a suffocating pose, nor people into a tuneless instrument. i refuse to let the fear of the unknown keep me from seeing the world, from sleeping on new beds, sleeping on floors, going a day without food to get to the next country, going a day without food to get into the next museum.


paris, i love you.

Comments

  1. J'ai adoré lire ces quelques pensées. Your words are beautiful and true. I've felt like this before, I love the intensity of discovering a new city.

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  2. Lovely thoughts. I see Paris has you, now, as well ;) As they say, once you visit Paris, you will always make your way back there again.

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  3. ahhh, so the rumors of paris are true? that makes me want to go there even more! i know i will find my true love in paris. i just know it.
    :)

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  4. What a gorgeous post. You give me wander lust!

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  5. p.s. Thank you so much for following BonBon Rose Girls. We just got our own .com, so I'll hope you'll follow us there too at: http://www.bonbonrosegirls.com
    . We are having giveaways galore this month in celebration of our move. Right now we've got a Kate Spade ring and House of Harlow earrings up for grabs! Hugs, K

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  6. i love your blog!

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  7. sounds dreamy! Have fun tearing up France!

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  8. Love LOve these photos!!! and am loving the vive and style of each one of them!!♥

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